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]]> http://www.ockhammedia.com/lighting-in-post-production/feed/ 0 http://www.ockhammedia.com/adding-the-look/ http://www.ockhammedia.com/adding-the-look/#comments Thu, 08 Jul 2010 13:24:15 +0000 matrixgirl303 http://www.ockhammedia.com/?p=353 YAY YAY YAY! Beginning to add the beauty into the music video. I’ll be posting before and after pics for my (and possibly your) amusement over the next several weeks. I’m always a little appalled at how ugly raw video footage is. This particular location we shot at had a greenish tint. That makes for some super good times on my part as a editor. But I’m kinda diggin’ the fixed up version. After Effects rocks!

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]]> http://www.ockhammedia.com/adding-the-look/feed/ 0 http://www.ockhammedia.com/burn-baby-burn-and-other-fear-busting-techniques/ http://www.ockhammedia.com/burn-baby-burn-and-other-fear-busting-techniques/#comments Sun, 04 Jul 2010 13:47:18 +0000 matrixgirl303 http://www.ockhammedia.com/?p=348 As mentioned in the previous post I was dealing with some major mental blocks in my career. Over the years I’ve adopted some fear-breaking techniques and thought I’d share what works for me. I use these techniques all the time without thinking about it. It only recently occurred to me that I could use them in a purposeful deliberate way.

When I am facing  fear to go after my dream/goal I:

3. Obsess on the vision. I know “obsess” is a pretty strong word. But when books like “The Secret” encroach our culture with, “just visualize what you want and next week it will magically show up” I feel obligated to say “BS!!” If it were really that simple we’d all be millionaires by now. So, here’s the thing… it’s NOT ENOUGH to merely want something. You have to want it BAADDD. You have to yearn for it pretty much constantly.You have to visualize yourself doing the scary thing and see it clearly over and over again. Also, you must be willing to make sacrifices to achieve the dream. When it comes time to make the sacrifice you should not be sitting there weighing the pros and cons of making the choice. If you are fully committed you will jump off that ledge without thinking twice and go for it! Many times we THINK we want something. But the moment we start going for it we get lazy or sabotage it. There’s nothing wrong with this. It might just mean we don’t really want it that much after all. So it’s best to be honest about that.

2. Baby Steps. When I begin working a new movie idea in my head I can easily become overwhelmed. In a state of overwhelm we usually end up doing NADA. So one trick I use is to establish the end in my mind, but then just let it go and ask, “What is one thing I can do TODAY regarding this project?” On this last music video project for example I used this technique. And literally I did something every single day that moved it closer to completion. Some days in complete stress from everyday-life-stuff, that one thing was sending a single email.  Celebrate! At least it’s something. When you work on something every day you create momentum. You may feel like you’re not getting anywhere, but at month’s end you look back and see you are 30 steps closer to creating your thing and that’s HUGE!! Here’s another thought… this last music vid project will take about 10 months start to finish. This is way too long by industry standards. Do you think I care? Ummm NO, I don’t. Throw any preconceived timeline OUT THE WINDOW. It doesn’t serve you.

1. Burn Your Bridges! We are always told to never burn our bridges, but in some situations it’s the best thing you can do for yourself and your goal! This technique is the most effective one… and also the most scary to employ. Here’s what I mean. Many times we set things up in a way that IF things go wrong we can back-out easily.  Imagine a guy who moved to a larger city to find more career opportunities for himself. Yet he kept his home back in the old small town  “just in case it doesn’t work out.”  I can guess what is going to happen with the guy, can’t you? Now, if he REALLY wanted to make it in the big city, he would “burn his bridges” and make it so he CAN’T go back NO MATTER WHAT! In this case he will be forced to find a way to work things out. When I know that fear is stopping me I will instigate the burn your bridges technique. It scares the crap outta me every time but it is EXTREMELY effective! I have pulled out creative solutions from myself that I had no clue even existed. It is very powerful. Burn, baby burn!

I’d love to hear what techniques you use to work through fear. What’s effective for you?

Some of you might know that I am a recovering self-help junkie. One thing that always comes up in self-help stuff is FEAR and how to handle it. After reading way too many of these books and experimenting with my own FEAR, here is my own little self-help series on the topic.

As I drove away from the cemetery tiny tears slipped from my eyes. I felt relief. I felt a sense of awe. Someone just died and I couldn’t be happier.  No, it wasn’t a loved one. But it was someone I knew very well. It was me. Rather, a part of me. I just finished shooting the biggest production of my career thus far. I was full of fear to take it on. This fear-based Torrie was trying to run the show. But as I left the cemetery, the final shooting location, I realized that deceitful part of me was finally gone…at least for that moment.

You might be thinking, “So, she shot a little music video. Big deal.” But, for me it was a BIG DEAL. Not because I had to manage a small crew, 5 different locations, 4 musicians, 2 actors, and one bird. That was the easy part. But I had to face some long standing fears, look them in the eye and find a way to push through. I am sick of playing small and it was that disgust with myself that made me get out the axe and start chopping away the limiting beliefs of my own making.

Now this is gonna get kinda personal, but I really want to point out that some of the fear-based beliefs I have around my creative abilities seem very legit.  I think you will agree. Here’s a list of beliefs that conquered me in my career and with this project specifically:

1. What if I approach this band and they say, “No, that’s dumb.” Or even worse, what if they say “YES! That’s cool!” (which they did, obviously)

2. Lack of funding. (anyone in a creative field can identify with this one)

3. I cannot shoot because I have a rare condition in both eyes that makes it difficult/painful for me to even look through a camera. (yes, it’s true. Still wanna hire me? )

4. I must suck at shooting because my former employers constantly yelled at me, belittled me and planted tons of fear and stress in me around shooting video.

5. It’s never going look as cool in reality as it is in my head, so why bother. I’ll have to compromise a million things.

6. I haven’t worked with actors since film school.

7. Oh yeah, I also haven’t really directed since film school either. (ummm, that was a decade ago)

8. With 2 small children, a business, and a household to run I’ll never have the time to set up all the shoots, hire actors, find locations, get props, costumes, arrange babysitters…did I mention I have to get a freakin’ bird as well?

Ok, so this is what was spinning through my head when I started this project  8 months ago. Don’t you agree that these fears all sound pretty good? I mean especially the money one and the medical condition one. Don’t we all think most of our fears are legit? Do we not use fear to create a bunch of self-justifying drama in our lives?

This is the first post in a little series on the blog about how I dealt with these limiting beliefs. I’m not doing this to be bragging or arrogant. I’m doing it because I am a recovering self-help junkie who would now like to give back a little something.  I’m going to tell you exactly how I dealt with the fears on this list. Maybe something will speak to you. Maybe not. But I’m gonna do it anyway.

What fears are currently stopping you? Write them down. Begin to challenge their legitimacy.  In the next post I’ll share my first tactic for chopping through fear-based thinking.

A few days later my PM and I went to check out yet another Gothic cathedral. It is in a cemetery so I was certain the noise would be an issue. So get this, the lady is showing us the facility and it’s totally adorable. When I ask about sound issues she says it’s not a problem. When she tells me the price to rent the place…it’s not a problem either. I tell her I want to book the shoot only a few days out. She says it’s not a problem, any time will be fine. Every concern I had about pulling off a successful shoot was addressed and surpassed my greatest hopes. Heck, we even get to use the church’s sound system to run our audio playback!

So, next Monday band and crew will be rockin’ it at this pretty darn cool-looking Gothic cathedral. (ok, it’s not really a cathedral…it’s a chapel, but still!) Call my story of intention weird woo-woo mumbo jumbo if you want. But I’m telling you it works!

The Final Location: found at last

This was our last day with the actors. By now we were all comfortable working together and the atmosphere was very silly and laid back. It’s a good thing too because we were shooting the most dramatic parts of the video today. So it was nice to have some humor and fun behind the scenes. I loved working with real actors! Coming from the documentary world, I’m used to coaxing people who are scared of the camera. To have people that love the lens was a total treat.

Here’s a few shots.

Directing at the Hospital

reverse angle

Is she ok?

ACTION!

I’ve been quiet lately because I’ve been feeling sorry for myself. On Tuesday the biggest shoot of this music video fell through. Well, it didn’t “fall through” really. I bailed on it. The band, my crew and I were all set to shoot next week at an awesome green screen studio. My discomfort with shooting green screen was there all along, but I wasn’t listening to it. “It’ll be ok. I need to learn this shooting technique anyway, ” I kept telling myself. It wasn’t until I met with the studio people that I finally heard that little voice that had been telling me “don’t do it” all along. It was then that I learned I’d need to drop a lot more money to pull off a successful shoot. It was then I realized I was in over my head. I was mad at myself. I fell into the old thoughts of “I really should be farther along in my career” sob story. “I really should know how to shoot green screen and what’s wrong with me?!”

Thankfully, that was yesterday. I woke up today feeling done with the pity party. I am back in my power and in fact I am glad this shoot fell through. I know that there is another location out there that will be even better…we just haven’t found it yet. This is not a failure. It is a blessing. I am sleeping great now that we AREN”T shooting on green screen. Duh.  I am listening to the part of me that knows stuff. It is saying that things will work out if I stay patient. So today, it is back to the grind of scouting locations. My assistant is back on the phone calling places. Our past efforts have gone nowhere. And after several failed attempts to nail this location down, I am more determined that ever to find the perfect location.

In the meantime, here’s some shots from one of the shoots last week.

Shooting at the wrought iron gate location

It was a very busy shooting schedule today. We worked with the singer, both actors, and the dove. The location was “bedroom”. We had to make the room look like 2 different bedrooms. The final edit will cut back and forth between the actor and the actress each in their own rooms getting ready for work. The dove was mostly cooperative and only tried to escape by landing on the ceiling fan once. Today was a challenge for me, directing wise. I arrived at this location sight-unseen. I immediately had to start changing my vision to fit the reality of the location. I feel like I spent all my energy doing this rather then being aware of the actors and what was going on around me. But, I am still very happy with how things turned out. Two shoots down, three to go. I will post some stills from the footage tomorrow.